that there is no way straight guys and girls can ever be friends, I def have the tendency to respect them less.
I mean, I do understand that for a lot of straight people, there can be a level of sexual tension. Especially if you find them attractive. But to seriously think you can never find anything to bond with someone of the opposite sex over other than sex or romance is very simple minded to me.
yea just cuz I find a girl physically attractive and may have and thoughts of sex or dating her doesn’t mean it automatically complete voids her as a friend.
I just think it’s apart of the whole societal treatment of sex and being in a relationship as one of the most important things you can do in your life. It’s NOT. they are both very nice and pleasant hings to have and be apart of, but if you elevate to such high priorities in your life it can definitely throw your judgement off a lot.
Now I have a few dating tenants as you guys have obviously seen, but two of them are race related.
Specifically on avoiding people with these mindsets when it comes to race and dating.
Now when I mean avoid them I mean in a dating/relationship way not being friends way. And not even avoiding them as much as just be wary. Be wary of what they say and do.
First one: People who only date inside their race. Thats obvious one. Racism/prejudice. Now, it may just be a coincidence that they only dated their own race (happens a lot). But if they specifically say “I ONLY date my own race, and won’t date others”, but then say “I’m not racist though”. Then you REALLY gotta be wary of them.
I have yet to meet any black girls who only dated inside their race specifically. But if I did, and I was interested in her, and she said that. I’d def give her the side eye. Unfortunately in todays society racism is still a big thing, and one weird side effect of the “progress” is that people are afraid to say they are racist. They will try to come up with Evey excuse in the world to just not say their racist, when it’s obvious they have a racist mindset. I personally wouldn’t wanna be friends with a black person who was racist/prejudice. Because even though they aren’t being racist towards me, thats still a lot of negativity in their mindset I don’t wanna be around.
Also in general, I’d either someone tell me they were racist towards black people rather than be fake and find out from someone else they were. Why waste my time?
Second one: the person who only dates a certain race outside their own. that in itself is a slippery slope. They claim, to not have fetish for that race, but if they only have dated that race for a long period of time and they were all different save for the fact they were that race. Guess what, they might have a (insert race here) fetish.
Now some people don’t even give a flying fuck about that, “Hey! they want me cuz of my race/body! Cool!” But is it really though?
Now once again, if it’s just coincidence that they date a lot of that race, and it turns out the past partners have similar personality traits AND they are that race. Thats fine I guess. But you just gotta be really wary of that. Here’s a good example!
The ever popular otaku male. They LOVE anime/manga, and LOVE Asian women. Once they get old enough(college age usually) they hunt for asian girls everywhere. They’ll even try to get with one that doesn’t like anime/manga AT ALL. but it doesn’t matter cuz they are asian. See where I’m going? No one wants to date somebody like that. Because they don’t care about you, just what you represent physically
Another thing is, they may be dating that specific race to be a rebel, because they knew their parents wouldn’t approve at all.
So yea, those are just thoughts. remember this isn’t fact or law, just things I’ve observed, and things you may want to keep in the back of your head. Especially considering the 20s is such a turbulent time to be dating. Emotions everywhere.
Also, if you find yourself reading this and realizing you may be one of the people I described to avoid, I don’t mean to offend or attack, you should just think to yourself “why have I made these dating decisions? ”
who say they don’t like condoms and don’t like the way they feel and use that as an excuse to not use them when the girl isn’t using any other form of birth control, STOP
It’s selfish, inconsiderate, and just plain STUPID. We don’t need you making any babies due to your lack of control over yourself or spreading any nasty diseases. Although condoms aren’t 100% effective, if I remember correctly they are the most effective form of BC to date. Also, if you’re in the mood and don’t have condoms? Do oral or something, the risk just ain’t worth a little bit of pleasure.
This was started by a post missdeejers made a few minutes ago about gender norms and women lifting(great post!). How they shouldn’t be deemed masculine and less feminine because of them liking to lift, and overall shouldn’t be looked down upon because of it. I agree 100%! I’ve always encouraged any girls to lift weights when they want lose fat and gain strength, and try to say it in a neutral/positive manner.
But I’ve been thinking about this for a bit, basically since I’ve encountered the female fitblr community. What would you guys think of men(fitness guys or not) who would engage in things that would be stereotypically feminine?
I’ve seen plenty of women here say the same thing, that they shouldn’t be patronized, or be talked down or called masculine, but when some guy doing something feminine comes up(depends on how fem) then they are more conservative. Some will simply say they prefer manly man, nothing wrong with that. Then others will actively talk bad about them.
So overall just wanted some input on both sides actually
Not trying to start a fight about it, just pointing this out and wondering about it.
in my opinion, there is nothing wrong with being a bit full of yourself.
I think it’s natural to be proud of yourself and the things you do.
Note, I said a bit, not a LOT. If you’re arrogant, cocky to the point where you are almost narcissistic and you think you’re more important than anything or anyone else, that’s a pretty severe personality disorder and should probably get that checked out.
But overall, if you can back up your claims as to why you are so awesome, and you aren’t harming the relationships of people that are important to you(close family and friends) than who cares?
Also to people who say they hate cock men/women, unless they are the narcissistic folks I described, you should chill out. It’s not that serious.
men are usually more likely to have leaner stomachs or six packs. But women always got the midriff going on? When almost NO men do?
I thought of this because every time I see a female version of a male superhero costume there is always a midriff. And other than because they just wanna sexualize it I always thought why? then I thought of the above comment.
just random thoughts
Even though I love tumblr to death. LOVE IT!!! There are a few things that annoy me.
Biggest thing? How sensitive everyone is. Why is this? Because the majority of tumblr are a bunch of angsty teenagers/young adults. When you’re a teen you’re smart enough to see how unfair the world is, but hormonal enough to let it get to you all the time(expect me of course, I was born with no emotions, hahaha)
Now, when it comes to tumblr I realllly love my fitblr section. Why because all we talk about is lifting, running, food, sex, martial arts. Real simple. The biggest issues are the serialization of women in the fitness industry and obesity/body image. Truthfully those subjects rarely show up, and when they do, we all get over it pretty quickly, and or can discuss them fairly calmly.
Fandoms are cool too, cuz why? All they talk about is their geeky shit. Cool. Fashion tumblrs as well. As of most of themed tumblr circles.
Then there is the rest of tumblr. Usually filled with full blow social justice/civil rights types, or others who somewhat see what the real civil justice ones will say and try to go off that and end up looking dumb because they don’t have the whole story.
Tumblr as a whole is SUPER fucking sensitive. It doesn’t matter what it is. Gender, sex, race, whatever. Almost ANYTHING a person can say will offend someone else (usually one of these “social justice” types) and then that person will go on a whole rant. Calling that person a large repertoire of ugly nasty names, completely debase this person as a human being, and then only kind of explain why what they said was offensive. But these are supposed to be the fair, open and accepting people right?
Now am I saying their still isn’t injustice in the world? DEFINITELY not, there is. It’s everywhere. But not everything someone says can be traced back to some form of oppression or injustice. You don’t need to over think and analyze everything. Because half of the time on here, you don’t know these people. You don’t know how they say this stuff, what their body language is, what their personality is like. Anything. It’s just text on a screen, no way you can accurately judge what someone is trying to say, unless they directly say something like
“I hate blacks/gays/women”.
THEN when you try to somewhat justify what you say and even full out apologize they still fucking attack you. Dealing with people on tumblr is like dealing with the media in politics. People take what you say, misconstrue and stretch the truth. “Gotcha tumblr” tactics will try to paint you as tactless and rude. No matter what you say? you lose. It’s fucking obnoxious. When you post something on here, you have explain to every last detail what it means, or someone may take it offensively. When there is practically nothing bad about it. People just make shit up sometimes, probably because something else made them feel shitty that day. Some things CAN be take at FACE VALUE, while others can’t. Try to learn to tell the difference.
I understand its YOUR tumblr and you say what you want. But does everything have to be centered around negativity and how everyone in the world is trying to get you down? I mean, if you do want to focus on that in your life, atleast try to do it from a more logical perspective. If someone says some thing offensive and or ignorant tell them why, in a calm cool matter. Don’t blow up on them. You know why? Because that doesn’t solve problems. It makes things worse. Almost every time.
Be a problem solver not a constant complainer.
Also, learn the difference between someone attacking something you believe in/you personally and them DISAGREEING with something you said. That is another issue people have something deciphering. One is them being an asshole, while the other is just them not having the same point of view, and usually doesn’t mean any real harm.
Other athletic/bigger guys always say something along the lines of
“I’m glad you’re here, takes some of the attention away from me/glad I’m not the biggest guy in the room anymore”
I truthfully never understand why. do they not like being big and/or athletic? If you’re big, muscular, athletic whatever embrace it! It’s nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about, men or women! Think of yourself as the epitome of physical power! Being incredibly physically capable. Thats a cool way to think about it.
“Big boobs on a fat chick doesn’t count”
I’m like….”Wait what?”
Just cause shes fat doesn’t mean her having nice/big boobs doesn’t count. I mean all boobs are is a collection of fat concentrated in that area. So if a slim/avg chic has big/nice boobs it’s fat as well. The logic, there is none.
Plus I’ve seen plenty of big/fat women who don’t really have boobs at all.
Do you prefer “bigger/curvy girls”. I laughed in response.
That’s like asking Samuel L Jackson does he like yelling in his movies.
Although I do think girls of all body types can be attractive, I def LOVE bigger girls.
Curvy, thick, tall, athletic, etc.
So bigger/muscular girls, I, Kendall will always appreciate yo body.